Shorter Sarah Palin

Palin Sees Conspiracy In New Dollar Coins

I mean, it's just bogus donchaknow changing how a coin looks. Keep your hands of my change! It's like the US Mint is a death panel now. I mean, I tell Todd not to mess with my spice rack, cause ya know what if the Russians in my back yard see that my cooking accessories are out of whack? Then it's like we're sending a signal to the communists and terrorists of the world that America doesn't have it together and then you've got unchecked abortion and indoctrination in schools. Cause gosh-darnit America can't tolerate freedom-hating liberals and their new fangled silver dollar that should have Ronald Reagans face on it.